Last year a bid to fund just four weeks of paid leave failed.
To show the true impact of that first month, Glamour followed eight women through 28 days postpartum.
Some had access to paid leave, others did not.
Read their stories, and join us to demand the government #passpaidleave.
When our son came out, he was pretty not pink and pretty not screaming.
My labor was so long, I was so close to quitting.
I was like, Just get this baby out of me.
Im at home alone now.
My husband had to go to work.
I cant believe that I have a person I need to take care of, but I feel fine.
I had PTSD from the birth of my first son, Landon.
It delayed me wanting to really connect with him.
This time I had a really good, fast labor, and I was immediately obsessed with Arlo.
I went into the bathroom and a blood clot the size of a lemon came out.
In the hospital we had to worry about filing all this stuff for my state parental leave.
So were printing and scanning, but my DC state paid-leave claim was rejected.
Its saying Im ineligible.
I think I was accidentally registered as working in Virginia.
But I work for a DC company and live just across the border in Virginia.
Im exhausted, and I cant figure this out right now.
Riley was born on Thursday.
We got home last night from the hospital.
Its hard to even remember who was in the room when I gave birth.
For me, at least, it was a private moment.
Just me and her.
This was the worst and most traumatic birth out of all four.
All three of my other births combined dont compare to this.
I pushed for over two hours.
They had to use the vacuum on his head.
Oh, my gosh.
It was so terrible.
I got a third-degree tear.
DAY 4
My biggest anxiety is just the transition with my son.
I keep telling myself that people have multiple children all the time, and its going to be okay.
I cant quite fathom how thats going to all fit together until were together.
The hardest part right now is money.
Ive worked really hard to buy a house of my ownfor myself, but also for my kids.
I dont want to risk that.
And I dont mean to cry.
Maybe because Im saying it out loud?
After this month or two, Im probably just going to start back working.
I breastfed for 36 hours in the hospital.
And then as soon as we got home, I was like, Cool.
So who else can feed my kid?
Why would I not do formula?
But then of course, theres a formula shortage right now.
DAY 5
My anxiety is spiking high today.
Being exhausted, and not having slept well.
Im at the brink of tears constantly.
Theres nothing actually wrong and everythings okay; its just the unsettling anxious feeling is there.
It took me a long time to decide to have a baby on my own.
Finding the right partner just didnt happen, but I wanted a family.
However, Im a neonatal intensive care nurse with long hours and not high pay.
The only way I could make this work was with family help.
My mom, brilliantly, is going to be my daycare when I go back to work.
Does one person go home?
Do we get a hotel?
Do we go to a friends house?
Im starting work again today, baking donuts for the cafe we supply.
Theres no option really.
I have to work.
I cant stop completely.
We need the money.
But I feel good.
Im just getting used to waking up with her.
For lets say a week, Im very at peace.
Work sent a dinner last night.
Its lovely to have that support.
Theyre great about it.
If I was returning in six weeks, theyd probably be keeping me more in the loop.
DAY 7
DAY 8
Riley is easy.
Its like Im working from home!
But for me, physically, its been very painful.
DAY 9
Were so happy to be home.
But were mourning the fact we didnt have the expected coming-home experience.
There was no being wheeled out with a baby in your arms.
And people being like, Oh, congratulations!
There was one moment in the NICU where we just stood over them and sobbed because it sucked.
And all we wanted was to take our babies for a walk.
DAY 10
I want to take six months leave; thats my plan.
I know how to not go above my means if need be.
Im not far enough along, and Im exhausted.
Now Im like, I need a new job.
So it can be both mine and my boyfriends income.
So were not struggling.
DAY 13
Were working four nights a week.
We start around midnight, and its an eight-hour process.
Do I wish I had paid leave?
Life is fair; its also unfair.
I went into pregnancy knowing that I would have to take care of that myself.
So its not a surprise.
But hopefully something will change.
You want to get real personal?
I am still bleeding.
I think I have hemorrhoids.
I know other people go through this, but not many people talk about it.
Not my family, none of my friends.
Ugh, I just hate it.
The 60% payments are based off my base salary, so its a significant drop in income.
Its only my salary.
Its a huge stress.
I know, Im terrible!
Anyway, Im so tired I could sleep anywhere!
Ive been out on my own, and on walks with Porter and Harvey.
Everyones like, Oh, why are you out right now?
You just had a baby.
Otherwise Ill go a little bit stir-crazy.
My husbands semi going back to work today.
So this week our nanny is coming in the mornings to help with Landon, our eldest.
Shes here right now.
We definitely wouldnt be able to afford this if I wasnt being paid my full pay.
Because weve had so much help, I feel Im healing faster too.
DAY 15
My boyfriend, Dazz, and my daughter are helping so much.
Last night Dazz stayed up with the baby.
But I still wake up.
I trust him and everything.
Its just that mommy thing!
DAY 16
My salary is our main income.
So were just figuring out our finances.
DAY 17
Im pumping so many times a day.
The most Ive done is eight.
Because its every five seconds of cleaning parts and reassembling.
Then Im like, Okay, the clock begins again.
Each time I pump, its 30 minutesthats three hours of my day.
Then putting milk away and then feeding, which can take an hour!
So I just put a pillow on the living room floor, and I laid there and slept.
DAY 20
There is no way I could go back to work yet, mentally or physically.
I still have to do twice-a-day wound care for my C-section incision.
Now that Im on leave, I see how much he loves us being here.
Im so thankful for these eight months.
Being pregnant for nine months is tough.
But by the time Ill be going back, Ill be so ready and excited to dive in.
Rileys such an easy baby.
Shes sleeping up to seven hours at night, which is just crazy.
But physically Im kind of a mess.
Ive burst several stitches, and there was a potential infection.
I cant stay on my feet for very long during the day.
I worry about this a lot, especially if I have to go back to work in a month.
I dont think Im going to let anyone hold her.
This 28 days post postpartum is interesting because it looks different for everyone.
The no sleep looks the same.
DAY 23
Theres no way I could work right now.
My brain is total mush.
I can barely string together sentences.
Were probably getting four hours of sleep a night.
DAY 24
In terms of feeding, its kind of an all-hands-on-deck buffet.
We use nursing as a warm-up for the bottle.
Were awake a lot.
Maybe we sleep three to four hours a day.
DAY 25
I didnt have any paid leave when I had my daughter.
I dont really want to start working yet, because of the baby being so small.
But Im doing hair to make extra money, and I like it a lot.
DAY 26
She just wants to be on the boob.
Were going to start the supper club when Yohualli is eight weeks.
DAY 27
I landed on the other side of this experience in a completely different body!
I have a different set of breasts.
My skin has changed.
My hair is thinner.
Thank God I dont have a partner to think about.
I cant imagine having someone chomping at my shoulder waiting for the option.
I feel lucky to do this alone.
DAY 28
These 28 days have just gone by so fast.
Im still bleeding, annoyingly.
I cant wear any of my maternity clothes, and I cant wear any of my normal clothes.
So Im just in the same one pair of shorts that fit me.
Thats the other thing: If I was going back to work, I would have no clothes.
I guess I would just be on Zoom wearing a shirt and no pants!
Because I had such a tough delivery, I expected these first few weeks to be a struggle.
But shes such a good baby.
Its making it easier for me to be okay with going back to work.
