For as long as Lisa had been alive, shed thought about death.
I think it was a weekly occurrence, she tellsGlamour.
I dont even think theyd usethe wordanxiousback then.
Getty/Glamour illustration
They just said, Yeah, she keeps coming back herewe dont know why.
Is everything okay at home?
The thing is, everythingwasokay at home.
Lisa was surrounded by a tight-knit family,a solid friend group.
But none of that mattered because their lives were in her hands.
And if she messed up, theyd die.
Or at least thats what her brain had been telling her.
As it turns out, Lisa hadobsessive-compulsive disorder(OCD).
For those with OCD, obsessionsrepetitive and unwanted intrusive thoughts and imagesare time-consuming and impede on their day-to-day life.
TL;DR: people still get what its like to live with obsessive compulsive disorderand OCD subtypeswrong.
Social media hasnt helped either.
And heres the trickiest thing about OCD: It doesnt always look the same.
OCD is creative, says DC-basedlicensed professional counselor Stephanie Woodrow.
There are common themes or subtypes, but OCD puts its own spin on it for everyone.
Its just a really sneaky disorder.
What Are the Lesser-Known OCD Subtypes?
Oh, I love this question, Alegra Kastens, anLA-based LMFT specializing in OCD, says.
Each of these fall under the same diagnosis of obsessive-compulsive disorder.
So know that when Kim Kardashain exclaims thatorganizing makes her horny, thats not what the condition is.
Below, three lesser-known OCD subtypes and the women living with them.
Shed jolt awake at night and peer into the crib to check that her sleeping baby was still breathing.
The fear of sudden infant death syndromeSIDSwasnt just a passing worry; it had become all-consuming.
But she wasnt just awakeshe waswired.
Her fixation was taking over her life.
Im not a runner at all, but I swear I couldve gone for miles on those nights.
Kastensexplains that for mothers with postpartum OCD, this kind of nighttime ritual is a textbook compulsion.
The backlash, of course, came quickly.
Birth control is a lifesaving medication, people snapped.
What kind of pro-life misinformation is this?
Logically, she knew the IRS wasnt going to come after her.
Did you make any charitable donations?all to prove that she wasnt doing something inherently bad.
Keagan wasnt obsessed with being a good mother like Lisa.
She was obsessed with being a goodperson.
She has scrupulosity OCD, a subtype that preys on morality, ethics, or religious and spiritual beliefs.
I think I taught myself federal tax code at one point, Keagan says.
Seriously, it was absurd.
But it didnt feel absurd when she was in her OCD flare.
She would ask her partner for reassurance.
She would check and recheck her filing.
She would read for hours about how to report her income correctly.
Before this, there was another obsessionone just like it, she says.
I would check and recheck candles, stoves, you name it.
At the end of the day, its all OCD, says Kastens.
And your themes can always change.
If you have pure O, that doesnt mean youll never have rOCD.
Or, in Danielles case, you might have both at the same time.
Did she say the wrong thing?
Why did her partner take five extra minutes to text back?
Does she even love them?
Do they love her?
The questions cycle in an endless, exhausting loop, she tellsGlamour.
You might have retroactive jealousy and distressing images of their sexual past, despite having one of your own.
You might also be convinced theyre not in love with you, despite them being all-in.
This was Danielles case, which ultimately caused her to seek internal and external reassurance.
But sitting with that uncertainty is better than seeking reassurance, according to Kastens.
Danielle also simultaneously suffers from pure O, where intrusive thoughts plague her.
She will have extreme memories of things she did 10 years ago or more that are distressing and embarrassing.
They are constant and painful; sometimes, she wishes her brain would just shut up.
She wants people with OCD to know that sometimes, thoughts are just that: thoughts.
Youll see all these social media posts like, Your thoughts are your reality!
Your thoughts manifest your destiny.
Listen, Im the opposite of what most people think when they hear OCD, she tellsGlamour.
My house is a mess.
Im not super tidy.
Im not particularly concerned about germs.
But just like Lisa and Keagan, that doesnt make her experience any less real.
