I cant have a full-on breakdown.
Michelle Williamsstars as Molly, who decides to embark on a journey of sexual exploration after her terminal diagnosis.
Nobody wants to see women in their 40s having sex.
Dying for Sexis based on the real-life story and podcast of best friends Molly (Michelle Williams) and Nikki (Jenny Slate).
Nobody wants see shows about cancer.
And yet inDying for Sexit all works.
Elizabeth Meriwether:A producer friend sent me the podcast, and I just tore through it.
“The show exists because of them,”Dying for Sexco-creator Elizabeth Meriwether says of stars Jenny Slate and Michelle Williams.
It was this incredible journey.
The story got bigger and bigger and bigger.
I love that mix of tones and the challenge of it.
Jenny Slate as Nikki and Michelle Williams as Molly inDying for Sex
I mean, Im always looking for great female characters to put onscreen.
I fell in love with these two women immediately.
Kim Rosenstock:I was like, Absolutely not.
That doesnt sound like its going to be good for my mental health right now.
RBG had just died, there were fires.
I was like, That sounds sad.
And she said, No, but its also about this amazing sexual awakening.
And so I listened to it and realized, Oh, this is about everything.
And to make it with Liz was just a dream.
Mollys journey just completely changed the way I think about life.
Obviously Molly couldnt be a part of the process, but how involved was Nikki?
Meriwether:I did an initial meeting with her.
It was so emotional.
I loved the way she talked about it.
I felt like she was really speaking for Molly and wanting to protect her in the process.
It was really incredible.
Michelle and Jenny, did either of you have a chance to connect with Nikki?
Jenny Slate:No, I havent gotten around to it.
Yes, I emailed Nikki before we started.
I just wanted to get in touch with her and say thank you to her.
I didnt know anything about how she wanted to be in this process, but Nikkis really open.
Its very easy for her to connect to people, it seems like.
I met her in person on set toward the beginning of the shoot.
Meriwether:I didnt know that!
Slate:Yeah, I have a picture of it.
It was kind of bonkers.
And of course we were crying during that conversation, even though we had one glass of wine.
We werent drunk ladies over wine.
Theres a lot to cry about.
Theres a lot to laugh about.
And then from there she would just text to check in and I would do the same.
So I got a lot from Nikki and I still continue to get a lot from her.
Michelle, tell me about signing on to do the show and what stood out to you?
Michelle Williams:I hadnt worked for quite a while, and that script really woke me up.
It was so different than anything Id encountered, and so immediately it felt extremely special to me.
And so the combination of those two experiences, I knew then Id be making this show.
There were some hurdles to get past.
Midway into our conversations I found out I was pregnant with another baby.
And so then this got put on pause.
Meriwether:There was a moment when I was like, We can make it work!
Williams:This was one of the very first people that I told that I was pregnant.
I was barelyit was glimmering in my…not my stomach, in my uterus.
Slate:Wait,what?
Oh my God, I thought it was in your tummy.
Meriwether:Michelle called me, and I was like, I dont know you at all.
Im so happy for you.
Can you still somehow do this show?
We both were trying to figure out, like, yeah, maybe we could time it and VFX?
And then it was like, No, of course not.
Williams:We were like, This shouldnt stop a woman from being in the workplace!
And then, after a delivery and postpartum period, it never got out of my mind.
I picked up the phone and called my agent and said, Who got that part?
Tell me who is it?
And he said, No, it hasnt been made.
Meriwether:It felt like your first love.
You lose your first love, and then youre like, How can I love again?
How can I love again?
Rosenstock:I mean, it didnt feel like anyone else could play the part.
It felt like it didnt make any sense for anyone else to play the part.
Meriwether:Yeah, so we ran to the airport, like, Dont get on the plane!
Williams:After that, I ran into Liz, who said that she was moving to Brooklyn.
And then I thought, oh, this is totally viable for me.
I was trying to be like, Im moving to Brooklyn,unrelated…
Trying to not creep her out.
Actually, Id love to hear more about being working parents on a set run by women.
Was that a different experience from past sets?
Meriwether:We had a strict no-children policy.
No, Im just kidding.
Rosenstock:Actually, there was an amazing moment.
We were in the middle of filming, and Michelle and Jenny had so much work to do.
Every day is a marathon for both of them.
I have some things I was thinking of that we could put in the playroom for her.
Would she like a little keyboard?
There wouldve been no reason for her to be thinking about that.
You know what I mean?
Williams:Its all about the little girls, as far as Im concerned.
Meriwether:I feel like it had to be [like that.]
We are all moms, were all doing this.
And in a not immediately obvious way, we are all doing it for our children.
I dont know what, exactly, is gendered.
Im sure men can build playrooms as well.
So its definitely challenging.
Listen, the kids werent on set every day.
Ill say that much.
Rosenstock:My daughter came to set, and I immediately had to send her to get food.
I was like, theres nothing it’s possible for you to watch.
Regarding the sex scenes…I thought Id seen everything at this point.
I had to then sit and unpack why it felt shocking to me.
I went to seeThis Film Is Not Yet Ratedyears and years ago.
And so I think that particular hotel room sequence was important in that way.
That sequence was so important because it was like, okay, were showing masturbation.
Were showing different moments of it.
Its not always just one thing.
It was important to show different kinds of orgasms, different kinds of masturbation, honestly.
Michelle, Id love to hear your perspective.
Williams:Similarly I felt like, Well, I certainly havent done this before.
I dont recall seeing this before.
And both of those things, the combination of those things, excites me.
Theres so much to say about it.
But…oh God, how can I pick one thing?
Its funny and its silly, and it also speaks, I think, so deeply to female sexuality.
I couldnt believe that I got to do that.
I think those were the first masturbation sequences that we shot.
And so words likeembarrassmentmight come to mind.
I felt very protected because I had my partners, even if I was alone between action and cut.
Meriwether:Thats beautiful.
I will take the blame for theSpeedreference.
That was definitely from my own life.
Slate:And mine too!
I think theres a lot shame around masturbation, around having a vibrator.
Some women dont even know how to get a vibrator.
The friendship between Nikki and Mollythe dialogue, their chemistry, their whole dynamic feels very lived in.
And now were friends with each other.
I feel like all of us had references of how we speak to our friends.
We all brought that to the show.
It wasnt like every episode a problem that they have with each other that then they solve.
There was enough going on that they needed to be a team.
It still was important that they pushed each other, but they did it with love.
Michelle and Jenny, can you speak to the first time you met and building that friendship?
Williams:We also showed up wearing the same outfit.
Slate:We did.
Wow, yeah, we really did.
Its happened a few times this week.
I dont know why Im so superstitious suddenly, its really odd, Ive never been this way.
Ive been walking under a ton of ladders my whole life.
But now an area of interest/deep instant fear is omens.
It feels like a good omen.
I did a chemistry read to have this part, and I was so nervous.
Dont you get it?
I read this script and felt, So annoying!
Instead, it was like, How about youre just glad that theres a good script out there?
So by the time I took the train from Rhode Island to New York, I was really nervous.
Ive admired Michelle forever, and I think shes just one of the best working actors, of course.
I was like, shes so smart, what am I going to do when I get in there?
What if Im weird?
Meriwether:We wanted you to be weird.
Slate:Yeah, thank God.
I found out theyre all really beautifully weird as well.
She herself seemed sensitive to me, while also obviously being such a powerful performer.
I just remember in the moment being like, I like people like this.
I like things like this.
I like intensity without being demanding or rough.
Williams:You know we did.
Slate:We did!
And it felt really good.
Meriwether:Honestly, I was scared.
So it was a really tricky thing to figure out.
The show exists because of them.
They should keep at it.
Slate:Id like to give it another spin.
Yeah, Id like to keep doing acting.
Jenny, your character really takes on that role in such a beautiful way.
I feel that about parenthood as well.
You assemble the vehicle while youre also trying to be moving forward in it.
Rosenstock:And also fix all of your own problems in the middle.
So many things are coinciding.
Demands are coinciding and energy needs to be constantly on the regenerative side while youre definitely being drained.
She says, Im not good at taking care of people.
Nikki is a sensitive person, and Steve has just told her that she probably cant do it.
Its also probably something that until then shes been like, Well, fuck you all.
But now, its just a different setup.
Her best friend is terminally ill, and she doesnt want that Nikki around anymore.
We were like, What is it like to be taking care of somebody with cancer?
He was so honest and went to some dark places for us.
He really talked about it, and it was sort of surprising.
And she was there listening to it.
Meriwether:I really remember that conversation, and it stuck with me and with Kim.
Im going to do this the way that I know how to do it.
Even if Im not a superhero, perfect caretaker, Im the caretaker that Molly needs.
That was a lot of our conversations.
Its such a rich area.
Theres a lot of, Oh, youre a hero.
Youre taking care of somebody.
You must be such a good person.
But its actually so much more complicated than that.
We tried to touch on that in the show.
This interview has been edited and condensed for length and clarity.
