I wasdiagnosed with psoriasis, which runs in my family, as a kid.
I remember my grandpa had it all over his legs; he never tried to hide it.
Maybe it never bothered himbut it bothered me.
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My psoriasis tended to surface on my scalp.
On one hand, that was great because it wasnt obvious to most people.
So people definitely noticedthat.
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Psoriasis made me feel souncomfortable in my own skin.
I was alwaysmortifiedwhenever I got my hair cut or colored.
Fast-forward to my life as an adult: I generallyhatehaving my picture taken.
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But nowIm a wedding photographer, and I love helping other people feel comfortable in front of a camera.
Looking back at my journey with psoriasis, pictures can be telling.
I was born to pretty young parents.
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They got married and had me a year later, all in their early 20s.
I was painfully shy as a child.
(To be honest: I can still be incredibly shy, but Im pretty good atactingoutgoing.)
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My parents gave me my first camera for Christmas.
I remember being really, really excited about that camera.
(This was before everyone had a camera!)
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I used to give my sister makeovers and take pictures of her.
I wasalwaystaking pictures and creating a story around them.
I remember taking pictures and then making magazines with them.
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Even as a child, I preferred to be behind the camera, not in front of it.
I never loved many pictures of myselfespecially alonebut I love this one because it feels like the real me.
Its my real hair color, and you’ve got the option to see my freckles.
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After my diagnosis, I didnt feel likemein photos anymore.I felt like I was hiding.
When I look at this picture, I think hiding.
(I hated going to the salon because of my psoriasis.
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I had created a larger-than-life persona to hide behindbut maybe not in the best way possible.
I met the man who Id eventually marry on spring break when we were both 22-year-old college students.
My lifestyle was definitely triggering psoriasis flare-ups at this point in my life.
I was drinking a lot, not eating right, and not taking care of my body.
I was having alotof fun, but it was taking a toll on my body.
I love this photo because its when my husband and I met, but it doesnt feel likeme.
(My now-husband had no idea what was going on then.)
I ran marathons and I even started winning shorter races.
I was also eating better and prioritizing my health.
My psoriasis flare-ups decreased during this time.
Ive found it really improves withself-care: eating well, exercising, and getting enough sleep.
I love to help people feel comfortable in front of the camera.
As for me, I still like to hide a littlenow its behind my camera.
But as a small-business owner, I have to brand myself in a bold way.
I definitely feel like my brand is a larger-than-life personaa pretty successful person whos somewhat separate from me.
No matter how confident someone may appear, everyone has insecurities.
Keri Calabreseis a wedding photographer who lives in Bridgewater, New Jersey.
you’re free to follow her onInstagramorFacebook.
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Jillian Krameris a journalist who writes about health, wellness, science, and adventure.
