Im tired of hearing my sisters say the same thing over and over.
It wasnt the first time a Black woman had spoken up about this issue.
That holiday season, though, something about Hensons raw emotionthe exhaustion etched into her facedefinitely struck a chord.
Her quotes from the interview with King went viral.
Family members of mine not in the entertainment industry brought it up at the kitchen table.
The world thinks of famous actresses as powerful.
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And its like, Yeah, but I still am struggling with the same thing I was years ago.
It was never Hensons intention to become a spokesperson for this particular issue.
Ive been saying what weve all been saying.
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I was taught and told that is when you speak upwhen your voice shakes the most.
I didnt say anything bad about anybody.
I spoke my truth, thats the only thing I can control.
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Besides, as Blige puts it: Somebody had to do it.
What are you afraid of?
Youve got to deal with it, youve gotta talk to it.
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You cant ignore it.
Still, it is a risk to be honest.
Gabrielle Union, another of Hensons close friends, andThink Like a Mancastmate, tells me.
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Youre meant to keep quiet, otherwise you will disappear from Hollywood.
[The industry] will get you up out of here fast.
So when she said it, that was really brave.
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Shes a head of household, shes a mom.
We dont have anyone to save us; we all have multiple households were financially responsible for.
And it happens; weve seen it; we know whos been ousted and why.
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I dont think were here to just benefit ourselves, she says.
That she makes it look easy doesnt mean that it is.
Im not fearless walking through this world, Henson says.
Im scared as shit right now with this election.
I have anxiety like you cant even imagine.
But I can manage it when I understand what Im dealing with.
When she feels overwhelmed, she tends to get quiet and still.
Then she asks herself a question: Will the thing shes afraid of kill her?
Most times [the answer is] no, she says.
Then what are you afraid of?
Youve got to deal with it, youve gotta talk to it.
You cant ignore it."
The multihyphenate, who recently turned 54, still vividly recalls when she sang Tomorrow fromAnnieat her kindergarten graduation.
I did something funny first, before I sang, and the audience laughed.
I was like, Thats power.
My dreams were nurtured as a kid, she says.
At age 13, though, Henson thought her acting dreams were over before they even began.
She auditioned to go to DCs Duke Ellington School of the Arts for high school.
Her best friend got in, but Henson was rejected.
I thought they was telling me I couldnt act.
So in my mind, that was it for me.
Politicking in Hollywood was a hard pill for me to swallow.
Its supposed to be that the best talent gets the job.
She memorized a monologue and auditioned without telling a single one of her friends.
Fear had gotten the best of me, she recalls now.
I dont even know if words were coming out of my mouth.
I just remember telling myself, You suck, youre horrible, youre bad.
At the end of the audition she ran out of the room.
She could never even bring herself to find out if shed gotten a callback.
I let fear beat me.
A year into her schooling at N.C. A&T, Henson failed a precalculus course.
Henson called her dad, who surprised her by saying the failure was a good thing.
It was a slap in my face, she says.
Fear and fate cant coexist, youve gotta pick a side.
This time, she got in.
When I finally refocused myself and said, Its acting, there was no looking back for me.
I said, Im going to master this shit.
No one is going to say I cant act ever, ever again.
She paid for college working double gigs at the Pentagon as a receptionist and singing on dinner cruises.
Henson talks about her years in the Howard theater department with a palpable reverence.
But the realities of the entertainment industry were a rude awakening.
Politicking in Hollywood was a hard pill for me to swallow, Henson says.
Its supposed to be that the best talent gets the job.
She is still waiting for that to be true.
The idea of support pops up again and again in our conversation.
Support is everything, she says.
You dont have to be rich to support.
It was a nimble, no-holds-barred performance that became a core memory for Black audiences.
She was so amazing how she portrayed every woman going through something like that.
When the movie came out, countless people told Henson that her career was about to blow up.
My discernment told me different, Henson says.
I knew very early on, before I even understood the politics.
I saw how things happen, and I was like, Yeah, it will happen for Tyrese.
And once I figured that out, I got frustrated.
Men work more, she once told Singleton.
To me now, she says, Tyrese took the fuck off.
Hes in two franchise movies, and I still have yet to do one to this day.
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Its true: Gibson has appeared in seven installments ofFast & Furiousand threeTransformersmovies.
Its very much not by choice.
In fact, Henson pauses after laying that fact on me.
Did you hear that?
I still have yet to do one.
To this day.To this day, babe.
I havent starred in a series sinceEmpire, she says, her words coming rapid-fire with passion.
Do you understand the anticipation around having Taraji P. Henson on your screen every week?
Theyre missing it, and that is getting on my nerves.
Shes not just roiled on her own behalf.
Henson tells me she goes into every meeting thinking: What are the reasons theyre gonna punk out?
What is the reason theyre gonna give me why theyre scared?
Every time I open my mouth, the public listens.
Are [these execs] not seeing that the people care about what Im doing?
The woman is a household name.
It makes sense that shes tired of fighting so hard to be seen by the powers that be.
Theyre making dumb choices out of fear, she says.
So these days Henson is focused on finding and protecting her peace.
I see myself traveling more for fun, she says.
Not for work, not to make money, but just to enjoy the fruits of my hard work.
Thats what Im ready to get to.
But Henson is far from retired.
Shes still got big plans ahead.
Still, Henson plans to be very picky going forward.
Ive played so many characters that now I get sent scripts and I think, Ive done this already.
When I ask what motivates her these days, Henson expresses that shes looking for a challenge.
Shes running toward a different kind of fearthe good one, the kind that makes for great art.
So if I get a script and that shit dont scare me, I shouldnt do it.
Its someone elses blessing.
If Im going to transform, that means the audience has to transform.
Thats what excites me, she says, her eyes lit up.
Stuff that scares the shit out of me.
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